Tuesday, August 18, 2009

UPDATE on finding my father...

First off, I know I've been away for a very very long time but the truth is I've been super busy with meeting up with family members from my WALKER side, yes you read right, my WALKER side. There are so many different emotions clouding my mind. I truly don't know how to feel know that I've met up with everyone. I can say I am blessed to have found everyone and be able to begin a new relationship while there is still time and while everyone is in good health and able to do so. Although I cannot indulge too much information on what went down (this will be covered in more depth in the movie as well as some pictures that were taken) I can share my feelings on everything that went down.
I can say that without a doubt this has turned into one of the best experiences in my life. I am so overwhelmed with the love and welcoming of my family. Their response and acceptance of me left me speechless. So many thoughts harbored in my mind when meeting them, such as: will they accept me? Will they assume I am finding everyone after all of these years because I want some money or something else from them? Would they want to establish a relationship with me? Do they care about me or even know of me? These and so many other questions have ran and continue to run through my mind. Most if not all questions, were answered by their gracious and loving welcoming of my arrival.
I first met up with my father, this was a long and overdue meeting. It was nice because we were able to sit down and speak one on one without the interruptions of other people. Then I was able to meet up with my Grandmother, My Great Uncle Elijah and Aunt Shirley, My Grandfather, and lastly my Great Aunt Joann and Uncle Farron. I also got in touch with my Aunt Karen in Indian and found some of my cousins on Facebook. Each meeting left me with a positive response and family connections that will no longer be lost. I've learned there are a lot of influential people in my Walker family, and that is where I inherited my passion for writing. Majority of my Aunts are writers and my Great Aunt Joann and Uncle Farron owned one of the largest African-American bookstores in San Bernardino (which is a coincidence because that is also one of my goals I want to accomplish). I feel like meeting my family has lifted a huge weight off of my shoulder and has actually helped in making me a stronger person. I was able to seek out my family and have the courage to conquer my fear by calling each person up one by one and arranging to meet with them. Something I would have never even thought of years ago. Overall, I feel if no relationship is established between me and Greg (my biological father) I have created relationships with so many key family members and have a better sense of who I am and where I came from. This has definitely been a long, emotional and sometimes tedious journey but something I am glad and blessed to have embarked on.


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